Do you ever feel like you’re on a tiny boat in the middle of a raging sea? Like the winds of responsibility threaten to blow you right over and you would do anything to anchor yourself?
But…anchor yourself into what? I mean, what is secure enough, personable enough, honest enough, strong enough and wise enough to deserve all your trust?
I once heard someone say “Adulthood is the worst "hood" they’ve never lived in”. Hahaha!
But honestly, there is so much we are responsible for as adults. As "Grownfolk". So many decisions we have to make and so many emotions we have to digest.
We manage our kids, our parents, our partners, our siblings, our home, our finances, jobs, businesses and on and on. Everything from huge life changing decisions to all the minute details.
Sometimes I feel like I'm on a treadmill that I can't get off of. Each time it speeds up, I have to run a little bit faster.
And while my feet are running so fast that they look like a BLUR beneath me, I hear a little voice, in the back of my mind, panting..."I don't know how long I can keep this up.”
I mean really, how can we keep it up? How long can we keep running when the ground beneath us is moving faster and faster? How long can we continue this --our feet running a mile a minute and we can’t even catch our breath! (...asking for a friend.)
Many people think that some external thing is going to help them feel better -- a drink, a drug (prescription or not), a night out on the town, some sex, or buying that next something and bringing it home. Though some of these things might offer a temporary high, when it has passed, we are right back where we started.
I say stop. Stop running. Just stop running.
I can tell when I'm at the end of my rope (sometimes I’ve already fallen off the rope, but that’s another story!!). I can tell because I feel exhausted, short-tempered, scared out of my wits and sad, really really sad…. and everything, EVERYTHING triggers me.
The treadmill analogy is a good one for me because life has churned up so many feelings in me — feelings of fear and shame — and I am literally running as fast as my feet (and heart) will allow, trying not to deal with them and "I don't know how long I can keep this up.”
Scary as it is, in the midst of the “chaos”, in the middle of the “busy”, I stop. I don’t turn on the television. I don’t call a friend to complain, I don't grab a drink. I go somewhere by myself (sometimes the only place is the bathroom!) and I just stop for a minute, breathe and give myself time to feel what I am feeling.
I ask myself "what I am feeling?".
Not "who did something to me?" , but "what I am FEELING?". That helps me to keep the focus on me. And the answers usually come flooding in and the tears come flooding out.
I don’t judge them, I just feel them.
I feel them and I accept them.
I accept the feelings (and the tears) and let them be.
The funny thing about emotions is they are a lot like Richard Pryor’s character in The Wiz— once you stop running long enough to take a good look at them, they’re not so scary.
Big feelings diminish under the light of consciousness. And when they do, a POWER is revealed. Our Power. Our Inner Power. A power that was in us all along (Yes! Dorothy!).
And that power knows the best thing for us to think, the best thing for us to say and the best thing for us to do next.
I believe that the Devine Force that created each of us (our Creator, our Source, the Universe, God) resides within each of us and, when accessed, can heal, strengthen and guide us perfectly.
So stop running and let your guidance bubble up from within.
I ask again, "what is secure enough to deserve all your trust?"
The Force within you, your inner Spirit, the God that lives within you.
It’s a space - a dimension - inside you that always knows the answers that you are searching for and never goes away. We just need to slow down enough to tap into it.
Download today’s The Force Within Worksheet from my website. Take it to a bathroom (or any private space) near you and write down the feelings you’re feeling at that moment. Don’t judge, Just feel. Feel and accept. Accept the feelings (and the tears) and let them be.
Then (in the 2nd section of the worksheet) write the realizations you get when the pain begins to diminish and your power starts to bubble up.
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May THE FORCE WITHIN be with you!
Rhonda Ross is a singer-songwriter, an Emmy-nominated actress, and a Personal Power Practitioner. For musical, speaking or workshop bookings: email info@TheRhondaRoss.com