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*******************************************************************************Are you the type of person who thinks about your life’s “Purpose”? If so, has thinking about it brought you clarity or filled you with anxiety?
Does thinking about it make you jump out of bed in the morning, ready to accomplish all your day’s tasks or does it make you want to pull the covers over your head and hide from the world?
I’ve never been the kind of person who thought a lot about my life’s “purpose”. I think about joy. I think about enthusiasm. I think about what lights me up inside.
Maybe it’s because I tend to focus on what’s important to me in my “now” (projects I’m working on, my relationships etc).
Maybe it’s because I’ve been an artist all my life and I've just sort of “gone with the flow” and let my path unfold before me.
Maybe it’s because I have always believed that my life is being guided by a higher power and I've tended to trust what happens to me and where it leads.
But is that “purpose”?
I recently had a great conversation with actress/singer Vanessa Williams. When I asked her about her views on “Purpose”. She exclaimed that she doesn’t even like the word!
That’s when it dawned me — maybe there are two types of “purpose”.
Outer Purpose and Inner Purpose
Outer Purpose would be more like “goal setting” and “hitting certain metrics by a certain time”. For example, “I have to win a Grammy for songwriting by age 30!!”.
I’ve never really liked those types of missions. There are too many moving parts for me. Too many other people have to agree. Too many forces that feel out of my control.
Instead, I tend to lean toward Inner Purpose. For example, "I want to spend more time exploring songwriting each day. The process helps me clarify my thoughts and my feelings. I love what it feels like to create something from nothing."
[Click here to learn more about the power of songwriting and how to use the process to empower your life -- even if you play no instruments and can't carry a tune!]
Outer Purpose is focused on accomplishments while Inner Purpose focuses on the reason.
The reason matters whether the accomplishment ever occurs.
The reason persists whether the accomplishment ever happens.
The reason fulfills even when the accomplishment is absent.
Outer Purpose that is pulled from an exterior accomplishment (to win an award, to lose a certain amount of weight, or to achieve a specific career milestone) can lead to anxiety -- even if you end up accomplishing the accomplishment!
A few years ago, I read a book called Start with Why by Simon Sineck.
In the book, Simon suggests that we take a good look at all the things that we love (and have loved throughout our lives) and the "aha moments" that have guided our way.
He challenges us to ask these questions....“What is it about these things that is important? Why were these specific moments meaningful?"
And through a series of other tools, Simon helps us find our WHY — Why we do the things that we do.
I think our “why” is another word for Inner Purpose.
My Process
Ever since I was young, I found myself interested (even passionate) about about many different things. I loved singing, acting, writing, and directing. I loved sports and dancing. Today, I love speaking and teaching. I'm fascinated with parenting and entrepreneurship.
"So many things!" people say to me. "But which one do you prefer?" They always ask. I used to panic when asked that question. Was I not focused enough? Did I not have a purpose?
Having gone through the "Start With Why" process a few years ago, I now realize that everything I'm passionate about is really just ONE thing: Harnessing my Personal Power and inspiring others to harness theirs!
That's it! And it shows up everywhere! In my speaking, my singing and my writing. It shows up in my relationships, in how I run my businesses and certainly in how I parent! It is my Why! It is my Purpose! My Inner Purpose!
Try this
Instead of looking for your Outer Purpose (through goals and metrics), why not think about your Inner Purpose? What lights you up? What would you do for free? What fills you with joy? And WHY???
Instead of the “end goal” motivating you, let your WHY motivate you!
And for those of you who are interested, below is my entire conversation with Vanessa Williams (and my wonderful co-host Eugene Ebner). She offers so many powerful tools to help guide us to our Inner Purpose -- The Force Within!
Enjoy!
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Until then...
May THE FORCE WITHIN be with you!
Rhonda Ross is a singer-songwriter, an Emmy-nominated actress, and a Personal Power Practitioner. For musical, speaking or workshop bookings: email info@TheRhondaRoss.com