Are you someone who finds it hard to meditate? Difficult to "Stop thinking", Impossible to "Turn off your thoughts" like all the spiritual guides tell you -- "Easier said than done!" you want to say back!
How on earth can I turn off my thoughts when it doesn't feel like I have any control over them at all? How can I wrangle those sneaky, racing, endless thoughts about my life, my health, my finances, my family? They have a mind of their own and are so insidious! How on earth can I control them when it doesn't even feel like I'm thinking them -- it feels like my thoughts are thinking ME?? (...asking for a friend)
Ah, but what if we stop trying to control our thoughts and instead shift our focus from the thought to the silence BETWEEN the thoughts? Have you ever tried that?
Have you ever listened to the Silence? Just purposely listened to the silence around you—even when (especially when) everything else is so loud? Can you hear it?
I was listening to an audio book yesterday using my phone’s speaker feature. I was sitting by myself outside on the porch and the volume of the book was perfectly satisfactory.
After a while, I walked away from my phone to have a conversation with someone. When I returned to listen to my book, I couldn’t hear it. It was so strange. I checked the volume. It was as high as it would go (and as high as it had previously been) and I thought to myself, “Why could I hear it so easily before and now I can’t hear it at all?”
The volume of the book hadn’t changed. The volume in my ears had changed. The volume in my head had changed. Just by talking to someone—having a regular ole conversation—I had raised the volume within me and though the conversation was over, it took me some minutes before the volume within me lowered to the point enough where I could hear the quietness of the audio book again.
It reminded me that internal noise (if you focus on it) can drown out the silence, but the silence (if you focus on it, instead) is always present. It was a great lesson.
This morning I was listening to the Go(o)d Mornings by Curly Nikki, a beautiful podcast that offers short daily meditations. Nikki is a dear friend of mine and on a beautiful spiritual path. Her daily podcasts are just like our in-person conversations -- deep, insightful and inspirational.
Today’s episode was about Silence—shifting our focus from the sound around us to the silence.
“You don’t have to quiet your thoughts,” she says, “You just have to shift your attention from the thoughts to the silence between the thoughts—the silences above, below and around the thoughts".
Eckhart Tolle speaks of that a lot too. If you don’t know about Eckhart Tolle’s teachings please check him out. In his book The Power of Now, he talks about the “un-manifested”. The “nothing-ness” from which all the “something-ness” that we experience is birthed.
We’re so busy focusing our attention on the “something” when (like a womb) the “nothing”, the “un-manifested”, the surrounding silence, is where all the potential lies. The Silence is where all the power resides.
This concept showed up in a song I wrote at the end of 2020. I was thinking about relationships (romantic, familial, and even deep friendships). I was thinking that there is so much going on between each of us. So much we can’t see. So much silence.
Powerful, powerful silence.
My Process:
I sit and close my eyes (if I have the time to do so).
At first I listen to what’s around me. Maybe cars. Maybe birds. Maybe voices. Maybe a plane.
Then I listen for the silence between the chirps, the honks, the words, the roar.
If that is difficult and I can't find the silence, I start with the loudest sound and then try to hear a sound that is less loud behind it and then the sound that is less loud than that and then even less loud than that.
I have to quiet my internal volume in order to hear it. Just like I did while trying to hear my audio book.
Try This:
Download today’s The Force Within exercise from my website and note the moments, as you go about your day, where you are able to listen for the silence.
Within all the sounds, the conversations, the music, even the television, spare a few moments to try to find the gaps where just for a fraction of a second there is “nothing”. The nothing between the somethings. The Space Between.
The power to reclaim our lives begins with us. It lives inside of us and is able to be accessed by us at any time, at any age and in any circumstance. It is The Force Within and accessing it will allow us to live our most joyful and meaningful lives.
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Until then...
May THE FORCE WITHIN be with you!
Rhonda Ross is a singer-songwriter, an Emmy-nominated actress, and a Personal Power Practitioner. For musical, speaking or workshop bookings: email info@TheRhondaRoss.com
