I peer around the corners of my mind
A danger zone
Never should go in there alone.
-Around The Corner by Rhonda Ross
Have you ever tried writing as a means of untangling your big emotions?
Writing is one of the ways that I untangle my big feelings. It’s the way that I investigate what’s REALLY going on inside of me.
Feelings can overwhelm me. They can feel as if they come out of nowhere and can knock me right on my backside. Has that ever happened to you? You’re walking along, enjoying your day, and BANG, you get smacked in the heart with a feeling that you simply didn’t see coming. Suddenly, you're flat on your butt in the middle of a busy intersection.
That’s all fine and good if the feeling is soft and squishy and tastes of chocolate, but it’s much less good when the feeling is jagged, sharp, and covered in rust. You can get tetanus from that crap! And now you’re cut, bleeding, and can barely catch your breath!
I've been feeling like this a lot lately. Maybe it's the accumulation of the past year and a half that we've been through. Maybe it's the discomfort of transitioning out of it. Take your pick!
Whatever it is....I've been having big, jagged, sharp thoughts -- sad thoughts, scary thoughts and I don't like them! Am I the only one that this is happening to? (...asking for a friend)
One trick that I have found that works when I find myself bleeding emotionally is to slow myself down and look more deeply at what the feeling is.
It helps me to name it.
Once I can name them, I can tame them.
Once I can name them, I can reframe them.
I can reclaim them.
(Hahahaha! I'm a poet and I didn't even know-et!)
Often, however, I can’t put words to my feelings without actually writing them down.
So I write.
I write a lot.
As you can imagine, I wrote a lot in 2020. I remember waking up one morning at the beginning of the lockdown when big emotions were throwing all of us for a loop and asking Spirit (during one of my meditations) what I should be doing during this unprecedented time.
The answer I heard was clear. “Embrace your son (he’s growing up so fast) and write, write, write, write.”
So that’s what I did. I wrote, wrote, wrote, wrote.
Most of my writing remained journal pages, but some became poems, and songs (and one extended piece actually became a screenplay). They all, however, served the bigger purpose of untangling all the big messy feelings with which I was grappling.
Here’s my process.
When I’m experiencing big feelings — I will "free-write" to get a handle on what exactly I’m feeling. It helps me crystalized the emotion.
So instead of it racing around my heart and mind, it flows onto the page, in black and white, where I can see it for what it is.
And it's usually not as sad or as scary as it felt when it was inside me. On the page, it's usually much more manageable.
Grab a sheet of paper (or if you’re like me, you may prefer to type into my computer) and just describe what you’re feeling in “one or two word” bursts.
Just write whatever the words are and keep writing until your list has it ALL.
Then close your eyes and ask yourself a couple simple questions… Actually, ask THE FEELING a couple simple questions…
“What are you?”
"Where have you come from?"
"What are you here to teach me?"
Wait for the answers and be prepared to write down what you “hear.”
You will be amazed at just how much you will learn.
The power to reclaim our lives begins with us. It lives inside of us and is able to be accessed by us at any time, at any age and in any circumstance. It is The Force Within and it will lead us to the Promised Land.
This is THE FORCE WITHIN. It’s a space, a dimension, within each of us where all our answers reside. Where all of our wisdom resides. It’s a place that we can go to at any time and stay for as long as we want. It is a space of unconditional and unrelenting love and peace.
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May THE FORCE WITHIN be with you!
Rhonda Ross is a singer-songwriter, an Emmy-nominated actress, and a Personal Power Practitioner. For musical, speaking or workshop bookings: email info@TheRhondaRoss.com